As a teacher and a perpetual student, the most important thing I have learned is that everything in life has a lesson to give...if we are ready or open to learn it. One thing that I have noticed is that often I will have multiple chances to learn a particular lesson. It will show up in trends through my own life experiences or in the things I find in my clients. Sometimes 9 out of 10 of my clients will show a particular weakness in the same area (lungs, knee, pancreas etc.) When I study up on it and figure out how to help them (or myself), it disappears and no one seems to have it anymore. The recent trend that I have been noticing is extreme stress. Sure, everyone has stress, and that's easy to pick up on...but lately when I work on people I am noticing a lack of reaction to the solar plexus (nerve center of the body), thyroid, AND the adrenals. That tells me that A LOT of people are at "the end of their rope."
I believe that because of the overwhelming number of opportunities available to us today, it is easier for all of us to get to that point and we all go in and out of high amounts of stress. We have SO MANY things easier than our ancestors (disposable diapers, washing machines, vacuum cleaners, cars, higher wages, credit, government handouts, haha) and yet it seems like we can handle less stress in similar situations. This shows up the most, for me, in the "mundane" tasks of life. Part of the pressure comes when we commit to so many things outside of the home (and family) that we don't have time left to do the things that used to be the center of life (cooking meals, cleaning the house, talking with our loved ones).
I've come to a conclusion that life is never going to get less stressful. I've watched my parents (in their 70's) get bogged down with stress...becoming empty nesters and retiring does not take stress away. It only changes it. Money does not take stress away (although I would find the money to pay someone to potty train my children for me, and I'm pretty sure that could lighten my stress load, haha). Now that this depressing news is out on the table, what can we do to lighten the load, or to change our perception of stress?
Here are a few things that have helped me reduce excessive stress, and that I talk about with my clients:
Write yourself a permission slip. Do you need to relax or let go? Sometimes I need a permission slip to un-commit to something unrealistic. Sometimes I think I am superwoman (of course I can raise a family, clean my house, teach classes, work on several clients a week, write a blog, volunteer in the community, serve in my church and maintain good relationships with all my loved ones) that is obviously unrealistic. When I get "in over my head" and feel ready to tear someones head off (usually poor AJ, sorry honey) because I can't handle another thing it is helpful for me to give myself permission to back off. I don't do this one very often, but every once in a while it is okay.
Ask for help. Let's face it, if there is a lot to be done you will not be able to relax until it is done. It may be possible for you to ask for help from family, friends, or church members. If you don't attend church and are looking for a good one, let me know, I'd be happy to tell you more about the one I go to, wink wink.
Breathe. Stop everything that you are doing and take some nice, slow, relaxing deep breaths (in through the nose and out through the mouth). For added benefit put a drop or 2 of your favorite essential oil into the palm of your hand, rub both hands together and cup them over your mouth while you inhale.
Make a list of priorities and say no to the non priorities and consider revising your priorities with the intention of reducing them (giving something non-critical up, or moving it to the bottom of your list, if possible). Remember that when you say yes to one thing you are always saying no to something else.
Make eating healthy food choices a priority (what you eat today will literally become the person you are tomorrow). If you are having a tough time making good food choices and want help you should check out my friends over at Envifit.com they help with meal planning. AJ is starting a program with them right now and has been very impressed so far.
Find something to laugh about. I just checked out a funny book from the local library (THANK YOU ARI and ELI for introducing us to the library, we are hooked!). There are also many silly videos and cd's that you can check out or purchase. Maybe you have some particular friends that always make you smile, give them a call.
There are so many things that you can do to reduce stress, if you have some good ideas to add, please add it to the comments. And, if all else fails, remember this famous advice, "when you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on." --Thomas Jefferson (and Franklin D. Roosevelt, sort of)
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