The "Eat More" Diet Theory

Being the youngest of eight (including 4 big sisters and 3 sister in-laws before I was out of high school) I have seen my fair of diets and diet fads over the years.  I have watched many beautiful and skinny women destroy their metabolism by putting themselves on strict diets that get them quick but temporary results.  The thing I've noticed about losing weight is that unlike your keys or wallet that get lost but you eventually find, weight always seems to have extra pounds when you "find" it again.  Even when people realize that the weight they "lose" always seems to return with friends, they keep trying to lose it.  So, because of this observation, my

#1 Rule for Healthy Weight is NEVER Do Anything (on purpose) To "Lose" It.

It might sound silly, but wording is important especially when dealing with our subconscious selves.  If your body gets out of hand you can do realistic things to tighten and tone it, or to balance it out but I guarantee you that if you try to lose weight, you will find it again...eventually.

#2 Rule for Healthy Weight is AVOID Putting Strict Restrictions on Yourself.

Another thing that I have observed with people who diet to lose weight is that they often put some sort of strict restriction on themselves.  "No Sugar," "No Carbs," "No Meat" " Only Meat,"Only vegetables that are grown on the north side of a farm that is planted by people wearing purple hats and rain boots." I think you catch my drift.  Why stop restricting yourself? Because what is the first thing that you want when you say "No Chocolate"?  ...Chocolate.  So mentally you begin beating yourself down in a process something like this:  "No! You are wrong to want that chocolate.  It is bad for you.  It made you fat.  It is not healthy.  Look at all the other people eating chocolate.  Oh I hope they get old and fat.  It smells so good.  Maybe I could just smell it.  I've been SO GOOD on this new diet (or lifestyle change, as the new trend is calling it).  I think I deserve something good (so you eat 5 vanilla cupcakes and pat yourself on the back for not eating the chocolate one...but you're still not satisfied).  It seems that every where you turn healthy looking people are eating that horrible thing that you are avoiding and they look so happy, so you begin justifying why it will be okay for you to eat similar things.  If you are avoiding sugar you start to engorge yourself in everything else with a sweetener in it (stevia, agava, honey, xylitol...which is good for your teeth, right?) or you can't have chocolate, but you can have carob...what about white chocolate, or dark chocolate?  Eventually we justify a reason to cave in and then we feel so guilty that we throw the entire diet out the window.

My point is that severe restrictions lead to severe justifications.  This is where my "Eat More" Theory comes into play:  I learned early on in life that I am healthiest when I never tell myself that I cannot have something.  I eat what i want, when I want it.  I study healthy eating habits and allow educated freedom to my diet.  When I know what foods do for or against my body I naturally desire healthier foods.  I take responsibility for what I do to my body and I enact self control.  I am amazed at how easy self control is when I give myself educated freedom.  I can have that fresh baked brownie or that ice cold soda...after I eat more of the things that are good for or respond well with my body.  If my desire for it is so overwhelming that I cannot wait, then I let myself have one bite (mind you that my bites are pretty small, and I take a long time to enjoy and swallow it).  I eat wise portion sizes and I eat slowly.  Dr. Christopher taught that you should "Drink your food and chew your liquid," meaning that you should chew your food until it has been crushed, broken down and mixed with saliva so well that it is a liquid state before you swallow and that you should chew the liquid that you drink before you swallow it to combine it with saliva to begin the digestion process.  When I finish eating I wait 10-15 minutes and check in with my body to see if I am still hungry. It takes our bodies a little time to register that we are full and often we over fill our tanks because we fail to wait for the early warnings.

Taking responsibility for our own health is key to good health.  When we take matters entirely into our own hands it makes it easier to live within natural limitations without feeling restricted.  I avoid telling myself that I can't have something, and I often tell my self that I "Would Rather" have something else.  With my children I have found that one of the best parenting styles is to offer choices. Tonight Amelia wanted to stay at her friends house because it was fun and she was happy, but it wasn't a good thing for her to do so I offered her 2 choices.  She could allow her friend to help her get fastened into her car seat and we could come back another day soon or mom could put her in her car seat (kicking and screaming) and she would lose the chance to come back soon.  I did not tell her "No, you can never come back!" I redirected the option to come back.  Staying wasn't a good choice for the time being, just like eating the entire bag of chips isn't a good choice but when I desire that bag of chips I give myself unspoken choices "I can eat more of the things that I know are good for me and then I can have a hand full or small sandwich baggie of chips or I can have one chip and give the bag away.  Often when I am eating good combinations of things that are good for my body before I indulge in the "desire of my heart," I am absolutely satisfied before I get to it and I decide that I don't want it as much as I thought I did.

#3 Rule for Healthy Weight is to PLAN AHEAD.

When you know what your next meal (or snack) is and you know what you are going to eat you are less likely to cave into temptations.  It goes right along with Abe Lincolns theory of sharpening the axe where he said, "Give me six hours to cut down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening my axe."  Meal planning is worth every moment that it takes.  Making the time to sit down and lay everything out will pay out exponentially when you see the healthy results on your body later.  

Final Rule for Healthy Weight is START NOW.

When we sit back and say "I'll start this new way of life on Monday (etc.),"  what do we tend to do until then? We eat, Eat, EAT!  I watched my husband do this the last few weeks.  He has a tendency to give himself permission to overindulge when he is not "in training," or in some kind of competition to be healthy, then when he realizes that things have gotten out of control he makes a tentative plan to remedy the situation and then goes into hyper speed to overindulge as much as humanly possible before he begins a new program because he knows he will be restricted for the next several months.  I wish that he would listen and incorporate my Eat More theory...at some point I hope that he learns to take responsibility for his own actions. 

Ultimately, we all make our own decisions.  We choose what goes into our bodies.  No one force feeds us.  We allow ourselves to get out of control or to become what we desire to be.  It is through small, mundane choices.  When we realize that everything that goes into our bodies becomes the person that we are the next day or days, and we decide that we want to be something more than we are today, we will naturally start to make better choices and eat more of the things that are good for us so that we desire less of the things that are not.

P.S. as a side note, When I lived in Europe I noticed that there were not many overweight people.  In Paris I discovered that not many people actually own scales and have no idea how much they weigh.  When asked why not the very matter of fact answer was "Why do I need to know how much I weigh?  If I change size, my clothes will tell me all that I need to know."  Weight does not matter to them, size does.  Try that thinking on for "size."